Gnostic encomium for the Mary Magdalene Revealed Retreat

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Gnostic encomium for the Mary Magdalene Revealed Retreat

Here is my rooftop shout for the world to hear my encomium* for the Mary Magdalene Revealed Retreat held by the glorious Meggan Watterson. Hear me full body shouting like I did the night I merged with God.

As I have mentioned before, it makes me super happy when all of the fingers I am exploring are pointing to the same moon. Though, as I write this, I realize it is true for everyone. We all seek out that which agrees with our beliefs and create self-reinforcing loops to make ourselves feel validated. My huge ballast on this finger pointing to The Good as inside of us, as opposed to external to us, is from my own experience (see the merging above). So I am going to speak from that place, as a Gnostic.**

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The Vault

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The Vault

The best advice I received (in addition to “take more pictures than you think is sane” and “get as much help as you can afford”) when we became new parents was about The Vault. The Vault is the place where all thoughts, words, and deeds that happen when you are insane with fatigue - that is where they live.

The door of The Vault is sealed with your faith. Faith in the choices you made when you were still a human capable of decision making and empathy towards yourself and your fellow man. All thoughts or discussions of a snarky, less than helpful nature go into The Vault. The “why didn’t you buy more diapers before the store closed and now we are all covered in poop you idiot,” or the “I don’t know if she is crying because I ate chocolate, we all ate the damn chocolate,” or the cranky 3 am snipe fest “fine, you show me how to swaddle this baby so she doesn’t stab herself in the eye with her talon nails,” all of that and more goes into The Vault. And it all stays there. Never to be thought or dragged up again the next morning/day/week. The strength of The Vault is trusting, nay knowing, that a part of you, the sane part, the part that once slept and didn’t cry at commercials, really wanted this baby/marriage/life circumstance.

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ACIM Review V vs the media frenzy in my head

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This morning we were on our walk and I was sharing an article I read to W. The article is about the American scientists who have graduated from the CDC Epidemic Intelligent Service and the role these experts have played (or not) in our recent societal adventure. For weeks we have been discussing where the leaders are on what has been happening, what the plan is, how crazy this all is (here is my favorite take on that particular rabbit hole). Then I dip into some theories about the Gates Foundation, the WHO, microchipping, and mandatory vaccines. The frenzy in my head gets louder and louder - then I read my ACIM for today.

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There is nothing more important than a daily practice with God - DO IT!

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When I was about 13 years old I vividly remember asking the Universe to for a life to stretch me, to challenge my hangups, to force my soul and beingness to grow and learn and evolve. The Universe heard me.

30th birthday present… stage 4 cancer. Boom.

Here I am, about to turn 42, a bit less plump and bouncy physically but oh so much wiser.

I can hear my 80 year old giggling at that statement. Regardless, here we go, immortal words of wisdom from one who is basically repeating what sages have known for aeons.

Spend the Amrit Vela with God. Wake up early (between 3-6) and meditate, do yoga, pray, and spend time being held by the Divine. Rest in God deliberately, with focus and intent.

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Post death God immersion integration, thank you A Course in Miracles!

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So, obviously, the evening of May 7 was really an experience beyond words. Initially, I was euphoric. Totally high, in love with the world, experiencing the gift of oneness and in awe of what happened.

As the experience lost its immediacy and tactile sharpness - I spent time mourning the shift. But then, the Universe did something amazing (not that I am surprised).

I started receiving nudges reinforcing what happened - during a yoga class, or a conversation, or in my A Course in Miracles (ACIM) reading. Nudges that strengthened what I had seen or learned or understood (again, words are hard).

Here are the nudges I received from ACIM over the last 6 weeks or so. Nudges that led me to share my story.

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The day I died... and merged with God (emerged from God)

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The day I died... and merged with God (emerged from God)

In the beginning there was the Word and the Word was a big bang. So here goes - my big bang.

May 7, 2018, my heart stopped. No heartbeat. Then, after a bit, it started again. That kicked off the evening where I merged with God and spoke and understood life from my God Self.

This is what I know. We are all the same. All is God. All is love. Beneath every … every moment is either fear that tightens the body or the invitation to relax into the Divine hug that awaits us all. God is waiting for us to relax into Him and see ourselves as one.

Yes, okay, backing up.*

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