Double Digits and cultivating Grandmother Energy

Sitting in the waiting room of our local mechanic, I turned to the apple-cheeked, soft white curled woman sitting next to me.

Let’s see what the Universe wants to tell me about this feeling.

“Can I share something with you?”

“Of course, my dear.”

“My daughter is turning 10 today.” Tears flooded my eyes. “It makes me happy sad.”

She pivoted fully to face me on her chair. I noted her pale blue eyes behind her bi-focals and the fine delicate lines on her cheeks. “Oh yes.” She looked at me, paused, and spoke so kindly, so softly, so lovingly. “It goes so fast. Soon you will be buying her feminine hygiene products.”

It took me a moment to translate.

Well, Corinna, you did ask Grandma Archetype.

She continued, “They also get so excited to talk about how now they are double digits. Which almost makes it worse.”

“She told me this morning that she is now double digits until she becomes seven digits.”

“Yes.” She paused, and looked at me again. “Be kind to yourself today. Do something to get this feeling out of you.”

Okay, Universe, I will do that. Thank you for the very clear instructions.

So I write, and cry. And cry some more.

Recently I was in a retreat with thoughtful, amazing humans. We spoke about becoming a grandmother in a good way. It wasn’t even my prompt. But THAT is how you know the Universe is organizing everything.* The topic came from a mother with her last child living at home.

What I heard from our facilitator was a description of grandmothers as mothers with a more expansive view of their community and responsibilities.

If I imagine my mothering focus like a laser beam at 5 feet, grand-mothering focus would be candlelight at 10 feet. Same space. Different light. The light of a laser is focal, harsh, and unforgiving. Candlelight touches every wall and crack in the room. A flame waltzes and dips with the breezes of life. A laser does not.

Thank you Universe for such clear instructions. I am super grateful.

*The Good Work Institute directly addresses this state of trust in their trainings for running meeting and developing consensus: “Trust that someone else is going to ask your question.” I love this, such surrender and grace in that maxim.